As most of you know, I attend church. Regularly. I also work at my church. I started attending before I started working there. I had always had my reservations about working at the church I attended because I never wanted to live out work frustrations (which are inevitable) that were so close to my church experience. After a few years of attending my church, the opportunity to work there came up, and I prayed about it and had my small group lift it up in prayer as well. I wanted to make sure I had no doubts about working there.
*A little background information: I never had formal training in art. I was queen of doodles and fake graffiti name titles in class notes. I had inclinations, but never sought out a class-probably out of fear. Fear that my beginners skill set wasn’t up to par with everyone else my age. I took a graphic design class in college and got a lot of encouragement from my professors. From then on I always felt like I had to use what God revealed to me to advance His Kingdom as best I could.
I took the job opportunity and I can honestly say that I love it. I am no expert, but I’m learning. I learn from my peers, I learn from my day-to-day interactions more and more about design and just being a better leader. I think, as long as you’re learning, you’re doing something right… This isn’t to say that I don’t have to work daily to fight off the negativity that happens in my mind.
I experience two kinds of stress with my work: getting everything to everyone and wondering if I’m plateauing. The plateau one is the one I am hesitant to share. Its very private and I prefer not to talk about it with anyone. I’m sharing it here with you, because I want you to be aware that its an internal struggle for me. It totally a real thing, and I have to fight my fear to not let happen. Fear is paralyzing- and if I pay it too much mind, I will plateau for sure. I have to keep in mind this verse,
There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. -1 John 4:18
So, I will try to create daily without fear and in love. God has placed me where I am for a reason. I don’t know for how long, or what’s next, but its pretty great right now, and I have to honor that by giving my 100% effort to excellence for Him.
* I had planned for this post to be about something else related to church, but it kinda became this. Its probably better this way. My thoughts we probably incomplete on the planned subject. Oh well, next time.
Pictures are from Bldg4000 Instagram